“I Was Blind”

continued…

I can still remember the terror of being in total darkness. I was finishing a client’s hairstyle when her image started to fade from my sight until I could see nothing. I tried so hard to make out the shape of her head but all I saw was black! I was totally blind. I tried to remain calm as I completed her hairdo strictly by feel. I was fighting to keep my growing panic hidden from my customer. Surely I couldn’t be permanently blind! How would I survive? My chest was pounding with fear of the unknown.

When she left, I felt my way to the phone and called my mother to come pick me up. She took me to the doctor and thankfully there was nothing seriously wrong with me… physically that is.

My eyesight gradually returned after food and rest. However I was still very blind… for, my friend, I was spiritually blind. I had never thought about the fact that I was going to spend eternity in Hell… forever separated from God… in constant torment. I had never really thought about the fact that I would have to pay for my sins. I was blinded by this world and didn’t know the truth.

I had always believed that Jesus was God’s son and I knew that He died on the cross and three days later He arose from the grave, but I didn’t understand the true meaning of His death. I didn’t know that He had taken my place on the cross and paid the price for all my sins. I had been to church almost every Sunday until I was out of high school. Yet I don’t recall anyone ever telling me how to be saved.

I didn’t know that… “Without faith, it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him” (Hebrews 11:6). And you ask me, “What is faith?” “Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see” (Hebrews 11:1). I thought the same way most unsaved church goers think today: If I tried to obey the Ten Commandments and was truly sorry when I knew I did wrong and asked God to forgive me, then everything would be okay. The problem with this kind of thinking was: I had no sure hope of a future in Heaven, I had no peace in my life, I didn’t have the Holy Spirit to guide me and comfort me, I didn’t know God’s healing power and I didn’t know His forgiveness. I was still lost. I didn’t KNOW Jesus; I just knew some stories about Him. I hadn’t read in John 3:3 that Jesus declared, “I tell you the truth, no one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again.”

I’m sorry to say that I had to try everything MY way before I eventually gave my heart and life to Jesus. I’m forever thankful to my brother Dale for sharing God’s word and showing me the way to the cross.

You may be asking what all this has to do with healing after an abortion. My dear friend, if you don’t truly KNOW Jesus as your Lord and Savior you have no true hope of being free from the bondage of Satan. But…” if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed” (John 8:36). I now sing because I’m free!

It was while singing this beautiful song in church that I realized how true the words are for me and I hope for you too:

At the cross, at the cross

Where I first saw the light and the burdens of my heart rolled away.

It was there by faith I received my sight and now I am happy all the day.

“One thing I do know. I was blind but now I see!” (John 9:25)

When I read about the pain Jesus suffered to rescue me from hell it’s hard to understand how He could love me that much.

I can relate to the sinful woman in Luke 7:37-38,47: “When a woman who had lived a sinful life in that town learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee’s house, she brought an alabaster jar of perfume, and as she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them. [Jesus said,] ‘Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little.’”

Because I have so many dreadful sins that have been forgiven I love Jesus with a very grateful heart. When I ponder the fact that one day Jesus will return to take me to be with Him in Heaven for eternity, I could absolutely shout from the highest mountain so the whole world can hear how glad I am to be a part of the family of God! “As it is written: ‘No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him’” (I Corinthians 2:9).

Dear one, there’s room at the cross for you. “There is still room” (Luke 14:22). Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face, and the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace. The closer I am to my Savior the farther my troubles are from me.

I have hope because “I know that my redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand upon the earth. And after my skin has been destroyed, yet in my flesh I will see God; I myself will see him with my own eyes—I, and not another. How my heart yearns within me!” (Job 19:24-27)

Now until next time… May “The LORD bless thee, and keep thee; the LORD make his face shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee; the LORD lift up his countenance upon thee, and give thee peace” (Numbers 6:24-26).

Read Part 6